By Taryn Jackson-Stewart
Circumstances and situations can be so misleading. Just one bad day has the potential to throw me completely off my game. I could be weeks into a new fitness routine; one with new workouts and leafy green vegetables…but let me have one bad argument, one rough work day or one “bloated” moment..and I want cookies. I have come to realize that there is nothing wrong with wanting cookies, or fries, or ice cream or any other self-indulgence, what’s wrong is not having the ability to talk yourself out of it by the time you get to the store or kitchen.
I have been guilty of allowing a less than desirable number on the scale, a disagreement with my spouse or a highly stressful workday convince me that I’m never going to lose weight, I need to get a divorce and that I need to get a new job. It is truly amazing how my brain has the ability to forget about the other 29 days of the month. The days when I jump for joy when I get off the scale. The days when I thank God for the love and support of my husband. The days when I finish a project at work and feel a remarkable sense of accomplishment. I am really good at forgetting about those days.
Just imagine the amount of personal success we would achieve if we weren’t thrown off so easily. I know that in order for me to start making consistent changes in my life I had to learn how to talk to myself. I learned how to have full conversations with myself about my choices and what I needed to do differently. I’m going to let you eavesdrop:
Me: “Ugggh, I look ridiculous in this dress. I’m never going to lose all of this weight. Why am I waking up early and watching every calorie I put in my mouth when it is obvious that nothing is happening?”
The Other Me: “Just yesterday you were excited about how toned your body was getting. The hubby and a co-worker also commented on your weight loss.”
Me: “Maybe they were just being nice. This is for the birds and I’m really hungry.”
The Other Me: “Don’t throw all of your hard work away because you don’t like what’s going on right now. You are going to be real upset tomorrow when you feel better and realize that you let yourself give up again.”
Me: “You’re right…time to do my 4 miles…where are my shoes?”
No matter what we struggle with; it is important that we understand that giving up is not an option. Giving up has never found a cure for a disease, worked out a family’s financial woes, or provided someone with a golden opportunity. Giving up is one of the devil’s favorite weapons and he uses it to attack us on a regular basis. What would happen in your life if giving up didn’t exist? Now where are your shoes?
November 7, 2011 was the day that I decided that enough was enough and it was finally time for me to walk in my purpose. I have been certified in group exercise and personal fitness training since 2006 and I have always taught aerobics at churches and other fitness facilities around the DMV, but until now, I was never fully committed to my calling.
After enduring 2 miscarriages and 1 ectopic pregnancy in 2009 I had no idea what I was supposed to do in the world of fitness. Especially with all of the weight and a completely broken spirit. God eventually blessed us with our son and while he is truly a miracle baby, I gained a lot of weight during my pregnancy. I turned 30 in September of 2011 and as a wife and now mother of 2 I knew that it was time to walk out on faith.
So with at least 40 extra pounds on me…I started running….I ran I ran I ran and since then I have never looked back – I just look up. Extra grace and mercy carried me through my runs and His love continues to do so. In the middle of my weight loss journey, I took another step out on faith and started my own company.
I am now the humble owner of Heavenly Body Fitness, LLC and look forward to helping others take care of themselves. As my son readily approaches the terrible 2s and my daughter continues to navigate her way through tween land there are times when the thought of going on my morning run seems overwhelming and it is in those times that I meditate on this verse: But they that wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31.